Handsome, no? So, one blistery morning this big friendly giant with great hair (and did I mention he is brilliant? well...you'll see soon enough, carry on) was slightly late for first period (I believe it was Economics 19,000 or no wait! AP Honors Special Smarty Pants Exhalted Beings Chemistry, yes that was it). After speeding his '92 Gold Park Avenue Buick with reckless abandon into his specially reserved "smart kid" stall, he threw it into 'park', grabbed his pack of texts, slammed the door...double checked to make sure it was securely locked (safety first, kids), and took off at a run towards Knowledge Landia.
Here's the part of the movie where we see a montage of Jaron sitting front and center in each of his 14 classes, studiously studying, interspersed with shots of the clock's hands spinning at a rapid rate, all whilst a lovely tune such as say a beetles-like variation of, "Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better" plays in the background. Suddenly, we realized that Whoa! It's 2:15 and school is over!, and we find ourselves wishing we could live in montages once in a while...sorry boys and girls, it's just for the Einstein's I guess. Jaron has successfully completed yet another day of learning and walks out to his car while reviewing a returned test, and wondering how it could be possible to only receive 101%. What had he done wrong?
As he approaches the "Golden Dragon," he reaches into his pocket to retrieve the keys. Not there. He tries the outer zipper of his backpack. Nope. The big compartment? Huh-uh. The box in the side pocket labeled "car keys"? Of course not...he'd lost the key to that box ages ago. Where could those blasted things be? As he heaved his load onto the gargantuan hood of the vehicle, he wished he had listened to his mother when she told him to buy a key clapper. But it was too late for second guesses....too late to go back to sleep....it's time to trust my instintcts....sorry. Tangent.
As Jaron stood, hands on hips, pondering...he glanced up at his bag and noticed something strange. It was vibrating. "Well," he said, "I'm no rocket scientist, but I pretty much am and I think I know why my bag would be vibrating in such a manner and I don't think it has to do with any kind of small rodent being trapped inside." "By Golly!" he exclaimed with vigor, "My keys are still in the car! And they are in the ignition! And my car IS STILL RUNNING! From this morning! And I've locked the door! (safety first, kids)"
He quickly catches a ride home with an amigo, and runs through the front door where he finds his beautiful, talented, intelligent, practically-perfect-in-every-way, and HUMBLE sister...we'll just call her Kristen for her own protection...sitting in the family room. Jaron spews out his tale of horror and asks his beautiful, talented, etc. etc. sister where the extra set of keys are. She's intelligent and talented, but she may or may not have lost those keys months earlier.
To make a treacherous treasure hunting story short we'll just end by saying Sir Jaron eventually....and I do mean eventually found said keys in someone's room (we'll keep her annonymous for obvious reasons), and was able to get in and stop his engine. But he will never live it down so long as I shall live.
THE END
4 comments:
good times. and the time i got the keys from you was from the first time i locked the keys in the car, this story was the second.
That was brilliant in so many ways! Thanks for the mental image of my favorite AP genius becoming human like the rest of us for a few moments. I'm pretty certain he made sure it never happened again.
it's rare when he lowers himself to our level....but occasionally he comes down for a visit. right jer bear?
mmm...almond joy.
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